Archive for the ‘@ the Optotrician’ Category

@ the Optotrician: actual eye doctor

David Langford on December 12th, 2017 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Back when I worked at Walmart, I overheard the following conversation: A guy wants to buy contacts but doesn’t have his Rx on him and his doctor is in another state. Walmart optician explains the Rx can be faxed to us since we need the written Rx and not just the contact boxes. Optician: Was […]

@optotrician: This is Safe, Right?

David Langford on May 30th, 2013 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

I was halfway done administrating non-contact tonometry (a.k.a. air puff test) when a 30-something man asked, “This is safe, right?” To which I replied, “Well, yah. A small percentage of people could faint, but…pretty safe.” To be fair, I have never had anyone faint after the air puff, but I have had two different men […]

Tags: , , , ,

@optotrician: Time for an Eye Exam

David Langford on April 26th, 2013 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Our Walmart Vision Center has a life-size poster of a tough-looking beared guy from Duck Dynasty. Someone thought it would be fun to put a Walmart name tag with the name “Willie” on it. It’s strange having Willie in the optical because you see him out of the corner of your eye and you instinctively […]

Tags: , , , , , , ,

@optotrician: Sunwear in Jewelry?

David Langford on September 28th, 2012 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  1 Comment

Guy with thick accent (Indian?) holding up $9.99 sunglasses: Do you have anything cheaper than this? Optician: Over in jewelry there are more sunglasses. Guy: Yes. Cheaper? Optician: I don’t know for sure, but probably a few might be cheaper. Guy just stands there. Optician pointing to jewelry: Over in jewelry. Guy: Where? Optician: Look […]

Tags: , , , ,

@optotrician: Nice Soup-strainer!

David Langford on September 20th, 2012 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

There is a different vaccine nurse at the table in front of the V.C. every day! I observed a guy with the biggest mustache I’ve ever beheld. Imagine walking around with a dresser comb under your nose all day. Then, later the same day I saw another guy with what is now the biggest mustache […]

Tags: ,

@optotrician: The Phantom Menace

David Langford on August 31st, 2012 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Older female to college-age male: “You are a menace to society. You need to get married.” (I think she was quoting Brigham Young, but it turns out no one can substantiate that quote.) Loud Lady at Flu Shot table: “No, I can’t take flu shot, but she nayd tetanus and diphtheria. Is thayt included in […]

Tags: , ,

@optotrician Stop Sweating So Much

David Langford on August 30th, 2012 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Is there anything I can do to not get that gunk buildup by the nose pads? An ultrasonic cleaner will take out the gunk. To help it not build up, try cleaning your glasses daily under the sink with dish soap that doesn’t contain lemon. Yesterday I didn’t have to bill a single insurance. I […]

Tags: , , , , ,

New Topic Category: @ the Optotrician

David Langford on August 24th, 2012 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Optoblog revolutionized optometric blogging with eye doctor-related comics and poetry. Now we have “@ the Optotrician” which contains quick anecdotes and conversations that actually occur at a vision-center/eye-clinic/optical/eye-doctor-office. This is à la Love the Liberry blog that I discovered when it was linked to by Mental Floss the other day. It’s so awesome that I’ve […]

Tags: , , , ,

Practice Names Never Used Part II

David Langford on September 29th, 2005 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

The is my second installment of Practice Names Never Used. (The first one appeared here.) Bull’s Eye Center Dr. Range Bull One Eyed Clinic Dr. Cy Clops Snake Eye Clinic Dr. Snake Unlucky Pop Eye Clinic Dr. I. Yam

Practice Names Never Used

David Langford on August 25th, 2005 under @ the Optotrician, Optoblog •  No Comments

Have you heard the Book Never Written jokes? Like, Under the Grandstands, by I.C. Butts. Well, I was thinking of eye doctor practice trade names never written: The Evil Eye Center Dr. Lucy Fuhr Ojo Loco Dr. Nicolas Riviera Center for Blindness Dr. Woopy A. Daisy Spit in your Eye Dr. Toba Koe Lazy Eye […]